Like most of you probably reading this post, I’ve never felt confident accepting a compliment. I don’t just mean compliments on my hair or my outfit; sadly, I also mean compliments on things like my work ethic or performance on a task. I’m not quite sure why, but if you say something nice to me to my face, I just get weird.
Recently, I got bangs. And not in the normal way- I didn’t go to a salon and wait patiently to have a professional do them. Nope! That just wouldn’t be the *Sydney* way of making an impulse decision. In typical Sydney fashion, I cut them in my friend’s dorm room on a Friday night. We were all sitting around talking about bangs and looking at YouTube videos and we decided I was the only one who had the forehead for it (flattered or offended?) and so I let my quasi-professional hair stylist/best friend Charli section my hair off. Five minutes of panic and a pair of kitchen scissors later, I had bangs.
Charli so kindly offered to cut them down to a normal length for me (I cut them longer than I knew they’d need to be on purpose guys, I’m not that dumb) so I handed her the kitchen scissors. Twenty minutes later, I was a whole new woman. And it felt liberating!
We went out and took some pictures (obviously) and posted the obligatory “snip snip” insta pic. I posted it, and then almost immediately pinned them up and never took them down again. None of my friends ever saw the bangs again, and they remained safely in a bobby pin until I got home after finals week.
After I got home from finals, my mom asked me where my bangs were and why I never wore them down. I said I didn’t like them and they made me uncomfortable and instantly realized that I was lying to my mom and to myself. I loved my bangs. The only thing that made me uncomfortable was the attention and compliments I got for them, because I didn’t know how to respond.
I don’t know about you, but usually when someone compliments me, I try to “dis-compliment” myself. I’ll try to brush off the compliment and do anything I can except, well, actually accept the compliment. I love complimenting people– so why can’t I receive a compliment gracefully and with confidence?
When I compliment someone, I don’t want them to brush it off. They look good or did good work and I want them to know. I’m sure when people compliment me they are being just as genuine. Sometimes, I even know my outfit looks good or the work I did is good and I still won’t accept it! It’s not cocky or arrogant to accept a compliment, it’s honestly the appropriate and classy thing to do.
Starting now, I am going to try to respond to compliments with a simple and gracious “Thank you!” and leave it at that. No more “thank you, but…” followed by a self-deprecating comment that everyone could have gone without. From now on, I am just going to let compliments brighten my day, and not be something that makes me uncomfortable or that I avoid.
If you struggle from the same tendency to “dis-compliment”, I encourage you to try the same! Say “Thank you” and be content! It’s about time we all started letting compliments actually feel like compliments.